What is it about little white lies that makes them so enticing? Is it the convenience of not having to tell the truth? Or is there a more benevolent reason behind our fibbing? Perhaps the truth isn’t always worth it, and we’re just happy to have a way out. Either way, we can’t deny that as women, we tell little white lies on a regular basis.
It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Sometimes, you’re doing the recipient a kindness by sparing them from your otherwise brutal honesty. In those situations, a tendency to blur realities should be encouraged, not deterred.
Other times, we’re more concerned with sparing ourselves from the consequences of the truth. In which case, I must warn you that despite the recent media glamorization of deception in shows like Revenge and Pretty Little Liars, the old saying still holds true—oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive!
With that in mind, here are 10 little white lies women tell on a regular basis:
1. “I’m on my way.”
When a woman tells you this, what she really means is, she didn’t realize you were already on your way and is just now starting to wrap things up at home. It’ll be another 15 minutes before she’s really on her way, at least.
2. “That’s the cutest baby I’ve ever seen.”
You can’t very well say anything else, so if all your friends married or getting pregnant, you probably find yourself practicing this line over and over again, trying to master it with a straight face. That is the cutest baby I have ever seen, that is the cutest baby I have ever seen
3. “She’s not that pretty.”
We tell this to our girlfriends who have lost men to other women, especially if the woman is actually drop dead gorgeous. No need to pour salt on the wound.
4. “I didn’t get your text.”
We totally got your text. We not only got it, We made a conscious decision to either open it or delete it right away, for fear of sending a “read” receipt. It’s 2014—you may safely assume that all your texts go through unless the Earth suddenly gets attacked by aliens.
5. “I’ll start my diet tomorrow.”
Ah, the ever present tomorrow. As little orphan Annie said, it’s only a day away! We don’t feel as guilty if we tell ourselves the clean eating procrastination will only last 24 hours, even if that rarely turns out to be the case.
6. “I’m putting the finishing touches on that project.”
Whether at work, home, or in an organization you volunteer with, when you say you’re just about done with something, you mean you’re really going to start working on it now and try to make some headway, since apparently you’re behind—yikes!
7. “I made this from scratch.”
Sandra Lee ain’t got nothing on you. Semi-homemade dishes suddenly become delicacies alleged to have been baked from scratch, right before your eyes. Truly, it’s a talent.
8. “I’m busy tonight.”
Most of the time, “busy” means hanging out with a bottle of wine and Netflix reruns. Ain’t no shame in your relaxation game.
9. “I’m fine” or “I don’t care”
We are not fine, and we most certainly do care.
10. “Your dish was delicious, what’s your secret?”
Whether you’re meeting the boyfriend’s parents or simply attending a neighborhood potluck, you’re bound to run across one or two questionable culinary items in your day that, no matter how strange they taste, you’ll have to pretend to like anyway.
It’s perfectly fine to tell little white lies, and at times even preferable over the truth. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me!